Author

Go On The Offensive

Christian people simply do not like to go on the offensive anymore. It is very common for Christian people to latch onto Bible passages that concentrate on the defensive portion of the faith. They love verses like 1 Peter 3:15 which tells us to always be ready to give a defense for the hope that is within us. Softer Christians will latch onto the word “defense” and never progress beyond it.

Unfortunately, they cherry-pick these defense-based verses but ignore the additional verses that authorize an offensive form of spiritual warfare. Those are the verses I want you to concentrate on because if you have grown up in the church, you are already well acquainted with defensive warfare.

For far too long the religious world has trained men to be passive pacifists and shy away from any form of aggression or violence.

They do this even though this same aggression is what builds civilization and keeps them safe. Many soft Christian men are anti-violence until they need to be rescued by the police or protected by the military. They preach peace until they need someone man enough to apply violence to an assailant. They have educated out of themselves the need to be masculine men who can defend themselves and their families.

Though those are examples of physical violence, the same pacifist mentality has spread into the intellectual sphere of these Christian men. Now they are unwilling to engage in spiritual “violence” even though it is authorized by the Bible, which we will cover shortly. They are unwilling to attack overtly false ideas or teachers. They refuse to address their fellow man who is wallowing in immorality.

Worst of all, they use “mercy” or “grace” to justify cowardice.

Go on the offensive. Pull Down Strongholds.

These men do not shy away from the offensive because they are virtuous, they do so because they are cowardly. They do not want to be the bad guy or hurt anyone’s feelings, so they simply let the immorality exist. They allow their brother to live immorally because they are too afraid of angering them. This is not kindness, it is hatred. A man who sidesteps his responsibility because he is unwilling to endure discomfort and then justifies it by twisting the Scripture is no man.

Let’s examine some of the passages that authorize us to engage in offensive warfare, and then we will supplement these with commands for general warfare:

Offensive Warfare

I. 2 Corinthians 10:3-5 ~ “For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh. For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ”.

This is perhaps the single greatest authorization of offensive spiritual warfare in scripture. Here we are given the signal to attack false arguments and pull them down. If you are an ancient general pulling down a stronghold, it means you laid siege to it and destroyed it, which requires you to attack. No man ever pulled down a stronghold from a defensive position.

2 Corinthians 10:3-5 is the biblical authorization to go on the offensive. Attack and destroy false arguments, there is no need to sit passively and ideally by as war breaks out around you.

II. Ephesians 6:10-17 ~ “Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.

Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. Stand therefore, having girded your waist with truth, having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace; above all, taking the shield of faith with which you will be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.”

While the specific context speaks concerning spiritual warfare and destroying temptation, there is no doubt that we also wrestle against those individuals who are vessels for the enemy. The bible teaches that the adversary corrupts the hearts and minds of men, therefore these men should be attacked (Acts 5:3, Luke 22:3-6).

The second half of this passage outlines our tools of war. I think it is beneficial to think of the shield of faith as both offensive and defensive. If you have read anything about how the Spartans used their shields in combat, you know that a shield can go from being a protection device to an offensive weapon in an instant. Any man who was ever hit in the face with 20 pounds of bronze-coated wood can attest to that fact. So also faith can be used to defend yourself from temptation or immoral argument or to attack enemies.

Then you have the sword of the Spirit, which is primarily an offensive weapon. You use the Word of God to go on the offensive to attack and destroy the enemy. You can destroy temptation with scripture (Matthew 4) or you can attack faulty ideas and false teaching (2 Peter 2:18-22). Everyone thinks of a sword as an offensive tool used for an offensive assault, so use it as such.

Unfortunately, we may have to use the Sword to oppose another man’s incorrect use of the Sword. The Bible does not contradict itself, every alleged contradiction can be explained if men are willing to have an honest, non-emotional discussion about it. But flawed human men will attempt to wrongly use the sword to justify their behaviors or condemn the behaviors of others (1 Timothy 4), they twist the Bible to their destruction (2 Peter 3:16). You will have to use the bible to attack other incorrect interpretations of the Bible where you see them.

General Warfare

I. 1 Timothy 1:18 – “This charge I entrust to you, Timothy, my child, in accordance with the prophecies previously made about you, that by them you may wage the good warfare.”

This is an authorization for general warfare, which I argue encompasses both offensive and defensive positions. Not only is faith a war, but it is a total war. It is not limited to violence on the battlefield, it also includes economic warfare, propaganda generation, psychological maneuvers, and discreet, pinpoint assassinations.

If you are going to war, do not think of it only in terms of the battlefield.

You must also consider all these other avenues in which men wage war. You will find many times that a man is using deception or propaganda-style war instead of attrition war. Men may couch their personal or political agendas in morality, and they may do so from the pulpit in the name of God. They can cloak their position in just enough morality that it becomes difficult to attack their position without attacking the morality they have propped up as a shield.

You must be very clear about this, if you have an enemy who is intelligent enough to engage in guerrilla warfare, you do not need to engage in attrition warfare. Most well-meaning Christians go wrong here. They respond to an intelligent enemy with emotion. They allow the enemy to frustrate them and this dilutes their ability to focus and make good battlefield decisions. What you must do is have the presence of mind to elevate yourself above the battlefield, see every position, and consider propaganda and economic attacks.

The Usefulness of Defensive Warfare

I am not suggesting that we get rid of all defensive warfare. On the contrary, I am suggesting that we add the principles of offensive warfare to an already well-established position of defensive warfare. Essentially every Christian man knows to defend the faith and be ready to answer those who have questions about our hope, but very few men understand and appreciate the fact that we are also to engage in offensive attacks on our enemies.

It is easy to be a defender, it is difficult and dangerous to be an attacker. To defend, you simply need to know the scripture. To attack, you not only must know but must also understand the scripture.

Application

Step one is to rid yourself of the guilt complex that is commonly associated with an attempt to engage in offensive warfare.

Because of your pacifist upbringing, you may feel discomfort when engaging in offensive warfare. It simply does not “feel right” to your intuition, but let me assure you that it is not only appropriate but necessary. It is your responsibility to help your brothers who are living immorally or have integrated some wrong philosophies, and it is their obligation to help you as well should you fall into some intellectual trap.

Step two: move beyond the basics of biblical knowledge.

What most people do is read the Bible, swallow a few lines they like without ever thinking about it. They accept the surface level meaning of what they read without going any deeper or trying to understand the target audience and societal structures of the day. This is an advantage for you in your warfare against them but is also a weakness of human nature that you will have to learn to avoid in your own study. The surface-level understanding is just our attempt to take the path of least resistance.

Deepen your understanding by concentrating longer on passages and reading supplemental materials like commentaries. Never simply swallow an idea, no matter how respected the source; always think about it for yourself first.

“It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain an idea without accepting it”
Aristotle

Step three, adopt the Socratic Method. Socrates was an ancient philosopher who confused and confounded the people he talked to simply by asking questions about their positions. It would not take many questions before his opponents were angry and were shown that they did not know that much about their own position. Many centuries later, Benjamin Franklin would adopt this same practice and go on to write about it in his autobiography. He had a reputation in his friend group of being the one who confounded the opinions of others simply by asking questions. Questions reveal gaps in knowledge, so use them as weapons of war.

Principle of War: You only have to ask most people“why” about three times before their position collapses.

To use the Socratic method, you simply have to question your opponent. By asking questions, you are on the offense and you force your opponent to take a defensive position. When an opponent takes a defensive position, it is very difficult for them to maneuver into an offensive one later. Being attacked puts men on edge, it pushes them into fight-or-flight mode, especially if they have weak positions.

Whenever they make a statement, ask them what they mean or question small portions of their statements. Force them to define terms so there is no uncertainty about the words they are using. Look for holes in their arguments that you can exploit with a carefully placed question. This has the added benefit of allowing them to destroy themselves because you are not attacking their position with direct statements. Their own words will be their undoing.

Be careful with the Socratic method as well. At the end of his life, Socrates was made to choose between death or exile. He chose death by hemlock poison.

Attrition Warfare

It is rarely appropriate to attack your opponent directly. You must almost always use guerrilla war tactics and intelligent maneuvering rather than all-out frontal assaults. Prevent yourself from being the “bad guy” by forcing your enemy to destroy his position. Or modify the way you attack the enemy so that they cannot be mad at you for defeating them, but may even be grateful for the correction.

One of the only times a full-scale direct attack is necessary is when you are dealing with an individual who is unwilling to change and will not listen to reason no matter how clearly and rationally it is presented. In this instance, it is your responsibility to bludgeon this individual as much as possible in the presence of as many witnesses as possible. Do not attack directly if no one can witness it, you will only damage your position. The point of the frontal assault is for the benefit of those watching, not for the one being eviscerated. You also need witnesses who can defend you if you are accused of being “unloving”.

But the real benefit of witnesses is so they can understand a few principles:

You are a force to be reckoned with.
To assist them in understanding the ridiculousness of your adversary’s position.
As an undeniable display of force – you are not afraid to go to war if necessary.
You are comfortable engaging in offensive warfare and are not limited by pacifist doctrine.

Fourth, have the character to stand resolute in your positions. It may make you less popular to be the one who is assaulting faulty positions, but it is a biblical requirement.

Fifth, choose your battles. Not every argument is worth having. Offensive warfare causes the attacked party to feel embarrassment and shame. Many people have fragile egos that cannot handle this type of war and will not improve if attacked directly. Again you must consider guerilla war tactics or quiet political maneuvers. Count the cost of warfare, it is expensive so consider whether it is worth it to engage in. If you are the type of person who is content being the “bad guy” and not having deep personal relationships with others, then offensive war will not cause you any real problems.

Also, all these tactics assume that you are holding the correct position.

It could be that your position is the one that is incorrect and you need someone to correct your thinking. If you are ever shown that your position is faulty, you need to have the humility to accept it with grace.

Never be mad to be corrected, because being corrected is the fastest way to go from being wrong to being right again. Have enough open-mindedness to correct your position, but be resolute enough to hold positions you know are correct.

Fight to the Death.

Conduct Yourselves Like Men.

The Sexual Market Value of Joseph

It is fairly simple to understand how a woman’s sexual market value is determined. All you need to know is if she is attractive or not. Sexually, a woman’s value is based on how good she looks. When men look for a sexual partner, this is all they consider, from a secular point of view. Even religious men first determine if a woman is attractive and then consider her character when they are looking for someone to date or marry. A man will not even talk to a woman if she is not attractive, despite what the “beauty is on the inside” proponents have to suggest. Unfortunately for them, you cannot have sex with inner beauty, so it is not the first consideration for men looking for women. What we will learn momentarily will help us understand how high the sexual market value of Joseph was.

For men, on the other hand, there are many more components that go into determining their sexual market value.

Looks are only a component, and though they are important, they must be supplemented with additional characteristics for a man to be sexually marketable. Most notably, looks must be supplemented with traditionally masculine features and behaviors along with a man’s ability to game a woman, and finally topped off by his status or affluence. At the end of the day, women have more criteria for what makes a man a desirable sexual partner, both short and long-term.

Also please note, when I say “sexual partner” I do not mean “husband material”. The religious world does its best to convince young men that behaviors such as being a good provider, taking care of a woman’s emotions, and being a good father are what make men sexually attractive. This is not true. While those behaviors make men good long-term marriage partners, they are not good for generating genuine sexual attraction in a woman. That is best done by a combination of masculine behavior plus game, masculine features (muscle mass, lower-pitched voice, etc.).

Women have different criteria for who they want to have sex with versus who they want to marry.

The church has tried to educate and condition women to desire those long-term provider characteristics (good provider/good father etc.), but conditioning cannot undo a woman’s basic biological need to breed with the man who has the best genetics. She will desire to marry the long-term provider, but she will desire to have sex with the most masculine man. This is also why many Christian wives will rarely if ever feel a genuine sexual desire for their husbands.

That is a brief glimpse into the female sexual selection process and there is much more to cover at a later time, but those few paragraphs should give you enough information to make the story of Joseph much more compelling.

What we have in Genesis 39 is a man named Joseph who checks all the boxes for a good short-term sexual partner for a woman.

The sexual market value of Joseph is quite high. Let’s have a look at these:

I. He is Physically Attractive – Genesis 39:6

The Bible says Joseph is handsome in both form and appearance. Meaning he had an attractive body and face. These are two basic characteristics that form the foundation of a man’s sexual market value. But that is not all, we also learn that:

II. Joseph is Successful and Becomes an Overseer of Potiphar’s House – Genesis 39:3-4

Arguably, even more important than a man’s looks are his status and ambition. Not only is a man’s success in his career reflective of his ability to be an efficient long-term provider, but it also reflects mastery and ambition, each of which women usually find masculine and attractive. Joseph climbed the ranks in Potiphar’s house until he was in charge of everything. Potiphar’s mind was free to focus on business and the kingdom of Egypt, and he must have enjoyed that mental rest.

III. Joseph becomes “Forbidden Fruit” – Genesis 39:8-9

Women want what they cannot have. So when Joseph refuses Potiphar’s wife, that only makes him that much more desirable to her. Now she has to have him because he is not only attractive and successful but also a challenge to be conquered.

Potiphar’s wife likely was not interested in one single sexual encounter, I argue that she wanted a long-term affair.

I base this on the fact that the Bible says “He did not heed her to lie with her or to be with her”. Why separate “lying with” and “being with” unless they describe two separate events. Potiphar’s wife wanted sexual access to Jospeh over the long term (Genesis 39:10).

Men like Joseph are what women want:

1. Successful
2. Ambitious
3. Attractive (Fit)

Consider these points the next time you hear a lesson on the story of Joseph. Go to your preacher and ask him about the sexual market value of Joseph and see what he says. Most men have no idea the temptation Joseph faced when dealing with Potiphar’s wife because they themselves are not sexually marketable enough to be valued by women and subsequently be tempted by them. Women like high-value men. Most men in the church are too busy using their virtue to justify their poverty to have time to train their bodies or build their wealth.

Consider how you can make yourself more like Jospeh if you want to be more attractive to your wife. Be masculine and work hard and put yourself first.

How to Have Character and Riches

A root principle of Spartan Christianity is the idea that your poverty does not make you righteous, and similarly, you can be wealthy and still be of good character. This was the case for Abraham (Genesis 13:2) and Job (Job 1), you can make it the case for you. Riches do not determine spirituality, but character does.

Please understand that this is not a health-wealth gospel, but simply a refutation of the “Riches = Materialism/worldliness” gospel, which is just as pervasive and just as damaging to men.

Here is a principle passage for the proper management of riches:

Command those who are rich in this present age not to be haughty, nor to trust in uncertain riches but in the living God, who gives us richly all things to enjoy. Let them do good, that they be rich in good works, ready to give, willing to share,storing up for themselves a good foundation for the time to come, that they may lay hold on eternal life.
1 Timothy 6:17-19

If you have headings in your bible you may find that it says, “instructions to the rich.” This line was likely directed at men who were already rich in possessions and were converted to Christianity at a later time. However, this passage undoubtedly can apply to people who are in the process of gaining riches as well. Even though Paul tells us not to be greedy or love money in previous verses of 1 Timothy 6, the fact of the matter is people are going to have wealth, so what they need to know is how to manage it.

Though men should not be greedy, they should still be ambitious. And ambition tends to be followed by riches. Given that many men will achieve success and riches, they should train their character so they can handle that wealth. This can be a difficult balance – ambition versus contentment.

This passage gives four brief points that outline how individuals with wealth should behave:

Do good
Be rich in good works
Ready to give
Willing to share

Technically you could lump these into two groups based on similarity:

1. Do good + be rich in good works.
2. Ready to give + Be willing to share.

This is as simple as it gets. If you happen to have riches, supplement that with good works. Be rich in good works. Engage in masculine behavior (which just so happens to be Christian behavior).

In addition to that, be willing to share those riches. Understand that you are a manager of material possessions while on earth so do good with them by helping those in need and using wise generosity.

The management of riches can also be supplemented with 1 John 3:17:

“But whoever has this world’s goods, and sees his brother in need, and shuts up his heart from him, how does the love of God abide in him?”
1 John 3:17

It is interesting to note that one of the ways an individual who just so happens to have riches can demonstrate godly love is by helping a brother (a fellow member of the church) who is in need. This idea certainly goes against the notion that “he who has wealth is worldly“. In reality, he who has wealth can help him who is in need. He who does not have wealth can help no one.

These five parts together are the foundational principles of how to have riches and still be a man of character simultaneously. The majority of the difficulty will come from dealing with self-righteous church members who believe that the only reasons they are not rich as well is because they are “super spiritual and not focused on worldly possessions“.

Do not place your riches above God.

That is the philosophy that is encapsulated in the five notes we mentioned before. If you are not placing your wealth above God, then you will naturally do good, be rich in good works, be willing to share, ready to give, and help needy brothers. You understand that the focus in this life is not on the material, but on the spiritual. You understand that the earth is temporary but the character is forever.

Begin to work on your character and it will not matter if you made 10 dollars or one-hundred million, you will be the same man. To be constant in our philosophy and behavior despite changing circumstances is the key.

Obedience Through Action – 1 John

One of the main points we try to continually hammer at Spartan Christianity is the idea that love and obedience are actions, not emotions. We continually see throughout the Bible that God demonstrated love towards us by taking action that benefitted us. So also we take action that benefits God. 1 John demonstrates this idea well.

It is not enough to say we love God, it is not even enough to feel it. Without action, there is no love.

1 John 2:3-6 ~ “Now by this we know that we know Him, if we keep His commandments. He who says, “I know Him,” and does not keep His commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him. But whoever keeps His word, truly the love of God is perfected in him. By this we know that we are in Him. He who says he abides in Him ought himself also to walk just as He walked.”

One of the reasons that John’s first letter was written was because there were groups of people in the church who were propagating two major lies about Christianity.

The first lie was that Jesus never actually came in the flesh, but was simply some sort of spirit. They made these statements because they believed that all physical matter was inherently evil, so there is no way Jesus would inhabit an evil flesh. John would go on to say that anyone who denied Christ came in the flesh would be an anti-Christ (II John 7, I John 2:18, 22).

This incorrect idea about physical matter led to the second error in Christian teaching at this time which was the idea that because the flesh is evil, it is completely separate from the soul. So while the flesh engages in sensuality and sinful pleasure, the soul actually remains untainted. These Christians were living their lives exactly how they wanted to, engaging in orgies, drunkenness, and anything else commonly associated with godless individuals. (This sounds like the Catholic church).

John refuted these two incorrect ideologies by first assaulting the position that Christ did not inhabit the flesh and then attacking the resultant secular lifestyles of his target audience. This is why you see the constant reaffirmation of the idea of walking in the light, abiding with God, and obeying His commandments.

News flash: if an individual is not living the way God intended, he is not a Christian.

This disqualifies many Catholics who live their lives however they please and then try to pay for their sins through indulgences. Other denominations are also not exempt from this habit of justifying immoral behavior through a misunderstanding of the law of God.

I John 3:4-6 ~ “Whoever commits sin also commits lawlessness, and sin is lawlessness. And you know that He was manifested to take away our sins, and in Him there is no sin. Whoever abides in Him does not sin. Whoever sins has neither seen Him nor known Him.”

One thing to note when John says that “Whoever abides in Him does not sin”, he means that these individuals do not actively go out and engage in orgies and drunkenness on a regular, habitual basis. Obviously, this passage is not suggesting that somehow after becoming a follower of God that you magically stop making mistakes. We are going to make errors, that is why we have the Advocate (1 John 2:1-2). The point is to avoid purposeful, planned, or habitual evil behavior.

It is somewhat funny that John has to tell his audience that the man who commits sin commits lawlessness. We tend to think of the ancient Christians as astute Bible students who hold firmly to the principles they were taught.

But we forget the most important point about those early Christians: they were human beings.

And as such, it is guaranteed that they would make a substantial number of errors in their faith. Those people were no different from us. They were human beings and so are we (a profound statement, I know).

One of the critical passages of this book is 1 John 3:18: “My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth.” Can you find a clearer statement in the world of the idea that love is not demonstrated through emotion, feelings, or words, but through action? Back up just two verses and you will see again how love proves itself through action. Specifically through Christ’s action towards us as people. “By this we know love, because He laid down His life for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.”

The idea you should keep in your mind at all times is that Love is not emotion. It is an action. Your emotions will fluctuate daily, but regardless of how you feel, you can demonstrate love through action.

Conduct Yourselves Like Men.

How Failure is Like Inflammation (Failure Part 2.)

Failure can be likened to inflammation in the body. When the human body is damaged, it undergoes a process of inflammation to heal itself. This same basic inflammatory process happens whether you scratch your arm or break your leg. It consists of three processes that overlap one another.

The first component is the inflammatory stage.

This period lasts about a week during which the body is trying to stop bleeding, get repair materials to the injury site and fight infection if necessary. This is the stage that is the most painful, because it begins the moment an injury is sustained. The body is rapidly performing all the “damage control” processes it can in order to limit the extent of the damage.

The second stage of inflammation begins somewhere between the 6^th and 20^th day after the injury, though many experts disagree as to when this stage actually begins.

This second section of injury repair is called the proliferation stage.

Here the body is trying to repair the overall damage of the injury by building new blood vessels, build new tissue to replace what was lost or killed, shrinking the size of the wound, and covering it with a new layer of skin. Each of these four processes happen at the same time, it is a masterful renovation of the body. During this stage, the body is recovering in a broad sense, not really paying too much attention to detail but rather simply trying to restore the structural integrity of the injured tissue or body parts. In this stage, you can move the injured site around and even poke the injury, and while it still may be tender or painful, it is much better than it was during the first week.

The final stage of inflammation is called the maturation stage; this stage can last from months to years depending on the injury.

This is where the body is finished with the rough renovation of the injury and really starts focusing on the details. It tries to line up collagen and other cells nicely so that you look like you never injured yourself.

Now what could this possibly have to do with dealing with failure? Here is the answer: when we are hit with a failure as men, we go through an eerily similar process of recovery.

Recovering from Failure – The Steps

I. Inflammation Phase: The moments right after failing a test, performing poorly in a sport, or at work are some of the most painful moments you experience. You may find that your lower back and kidneys begin to hurt. Your head may start to spin, and you question your adequacy as a man and perhaps question if it is worth it to stay alive.

The most important action you can take at this moment is to avoid ruminating on the failure. Just like you put an icepack on a new injury to limit inflammation, you must put an icepack of sorts on your mind. You need to do anything you can to distract your mind and put it on a different loop. What you are trying to do is prevent your brain from replaying the failure over and over again and also prevent yourself from thinking about what you would have done differently.

You can derail your train of thought by training extremely hard, playing a game, or diving into your favorite distraction. You have to prevent yourself from ruminating. One failure is enough, there is no need to mentally relive it for the next hour; that is the source of the majority of stress in people’s minds.

This first action is the Damage Control Maneuver.

II. Proliferation Phase: If you scratch a chunk out of your arm, the body dutifully fills that hole. If you take a chunk out of your pride or self-esteem by failing, you must repair it the same way. At this point, the pain of the failure itself is leaving, though your pride may still be aching. In this period, you can begin to assess what went wrong with your performance in a rational, detached way. You will want to wait several days to begin this process if possible because the pain and emotions of the inflammatory stage make it impossible to be rational about your performance.

You must simultaneously repair your self-esteem by winning small successes in other life areas and reassess and prepare to go to war with your enemy – be it an exam, a project, or a speech. Once you have clearly located the gaps in your ability, attack them with ferocious force. You must train and practice far more than you did in your first attempt with the enemy. You must also put your mind in a superior position. If you go into the next project or exam already demoralized or defeated, you will get crushed. But if you go into the project with a fire in your eyes and the intense desire to annihilate that enemy, you will be victorious.

This second act of mass preparation is the Sword Sharpening Maneuver.

“The general who wins the battle makes many calculations in his temple before the battle is fought. The general who loses makes but few calculations beforehand.” ~Sun Tzu

III. Maturation Phase: This is the long-term recovery from failure where you integrate the lessons learned into your character and actually learn to become thankful for the failure. You learn some of the most important lessons of your life in failure from how to manage your immediate emotions, recover self-esteem, and become more intense in your work. Once those lessons are integrated into your character, you are more masculine, and the pain of failure is essentially gone. Perhaps you feel a few nagging aches every few weeks, but for the most part, you have completely recovered.

You complete this phase of healing by looking back on the failure while completely detached and free from the painful emotions of the first two phases. From this perspective, you can see all the ways your failure actually made you better, stronger, and more mentally prepared for your future.

This final action is the Reclaiming the Throne Maneuver.

As bad as failure feels at the time, what you will notice over time is that the more you attempt anything, the more you will fail. The more you fail, the shorter the inflammation of failure becomes. Your first major failure may take you two months to recover from. The next failure just 6 weeks. This will progress until you have accepted failure as a part of life, extract its benefits, and recover within a few days or even within a few hours if you are a master. Learn to manage and appreciate the inflammation of failure and you will undoubtedly be a great man.

You also need standards for your own personal failure, weather in your physical training in personal growth. Without standards and the reality of failure, we have no way to evaluate our performance. When we cannot evaluate our performance, we cannot know when we have failed. If we cannot know when we fail, we will not know when we need to improve. When we do not know if we need to improve, we will remain stagnant. Therefore, failure is a compass of character, it directs us towards who we want to be. A man must first decide who he wants to be before he can begin working on becoming that ideal.

“Those in athletic pursuit first chose the sport they want, and then do the work.” ~ Epictetus

Be willing to fail. Do not let the fear of failure prevent you from acting. Failure is a surefire path to growth and learning. And it comes at a fraction of the cost of a modern college education.

The next time you hit failure, try to rush being thankful for that failure. You just learned a lesson you will never forget. That alone makes failure a better teacher than any egghead in a classroom.

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; . . . who at best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.” ~ Theodore Roosevelt

Conduct Yourselves like Men.

Reference: Epictetus, and Robert Dobbin. Discourses and Selected Writings. Penguin Books, 2008.

Page 45 of 82

« Previous 1 … 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 … 82 Next »