Why Are Christians Miserable?

“Because to every purpose there is time and judgment, therefore the misery of man is great upon him.”

Ecclesiastes 8:6

“Remember also your Creator in the days of your youth, before the evil days come and the years draw near of which you will say, ‘I have no pleasure in them’”.

Ecclesiastes 12:1

“Give strong drink to the one who is perishing, and wine to those in bitter distress; let them drink and forget their poverty and remember their misery no more”

Proverbs 31: 6,7

We attack popular and common dogma propagated by the traditionalists because it leads men to have false expectations about the Christian lifestyle.

People will try to tell you to ‘have joy’ or to ‘be happy in your faith and salvation’ when happiness has nothing to do with it.

God is much more concerned about our holiness than He is our happiness.

Happiness is a superficial emotion that can be replicated with heroin. 

The exaggeration of happiness in the church leads some people to question the validity of their faith when they find themselves in a temporary state of total misery.

In those moments you say to yourself, “But I am a Christian! Shouldn’t I be happy? Look at my salvation!” But you know in your mind that those thoughts will not save you from misery.

You question your faith and you question the church as a result. You wonder how the life of a person of God could be so painful.

This is because you were not told the truth about the faith.

Jesus tells us to take up our cross and follow Him (Matthew 16:24-26).

Does that sound like a lot of fun to you? 

Does suffering for the cause of Christ sound like a great party?

Men, we are confusing ourselves if we think in this manner. 

It is noble to suffer for Christ, but that does not make it enjoyable.

It is fair to say that very few people in the modern Western world have truly suffered for their faith mentally, physically or emotionally.

Those few people who have suffered certainly did not enjoy suffering for the sake of suffering. No rational man enjoys that extreme discomfort for its own sake.

Christ is the only one who gives meaning to the pain we endure. It is the promise of salvation from hell and the reward of heaven that makes the suffering bearable, that is what minuscule amount of it we have today.

Men, we are weak and soft. We think that we are persecuted and that we suffer when we do not even know the meaning of the word.

The majority of our suffering is in our imagination.

This does not stop us from descending into absolute misery. 

The Source

We detach from ourselves and look at our life and see all the pleasures we are missing out on for the sake of Christ. For everything we are giving up in this life, is heaven going to be worth it?

These deep questions send us spiraling into misery and depression, because we are not convinced that heaven will be worth the sacrifice, and all we know is that we are missing out on a ton of sex and other pleasures.

We are in a mental state of suffering that is the opposite of the constant happiness that the liberals promise. And we do not have any of the so-called joy that the conservatives suggest faith provides. “Is my faith even real?”, we ask as a result.

Yes it is, and being miserable is sometimes a part of it.

The misery of life, however, does not give us the right to make a big show out of it.

When Jesus instructed His disciples fasting, He told them to not disfigure their countenances like the Pharisees, but to wash their faces and go about their business normally as if they were not fasting at all (Matthew 6:16-34).

The purpose of doing good and going through discomfort for Christ is not so we can act like Pharisees and make a show out of it. We will never convert other people to Christ if our temporary misery is apparent to the whole world. 

Misery and discomfort are parts of life and the Christian walk. You will not always be happy and joyous like the radical left and right wing Christians claim.

This is perfectly fine.

If you weren’t going through some kind of misery at least occasionally, you need to question if you really are a Christian. If you do not regularly wrestle with faith and doubt, what kind of faith do you have?

Answer: A blind faith.

Mantra

Misery is the proving ground of faith. 

Total Misery

Application

Accept misery as a part of life, a temporary inconvenience on our journey to heaven.

Life is uncomfortable, especially for the modern Christian who is accustomed to constant comfort. “Pain” is why we seek refuge in our mindless habits.

We watch television, play video games, and roam on social media for hours because these things allow us to immerse ourselves in them, and in doing so we forget about reality, even if only for a moment. 

These are drugs that we have learned to justify in our lives. Some of the negative aspects of drugs and drinking can be found in social media and television watching (Poor time stewardship, lack of vigilance etc.).

We cannot constantly use these medications as crutches to avoid the sorrow of life.

Why God chose to create a world consisting primarily of suffering is a question that currently does not have a good answer. Many males in the church try to answer it with “True Fulfillment” and other nonsense, but to our heart of hearts those answers never satisfy.

We know there must be more to the story of suffering that we do not yet understand. 

After accepting misery, we must learn not to judge the quality of our faith based on our emotional feelings at the time.

People are afraid to accept the sorrow of life because they think they are being irreverent or insulting God by not enjoying the life He gave them.

This could not be farther from the truth.

Your emotions mean nothing. You need to focus your mind on doing what is right and taking the correct actions, rather than worrying about how you are feeling at any given time. 

What God requires from us is our obedience and trust, these attributes can be taken without emotion. So whatever miserable feeling you experience, learn to ignore it. 

Get a grip. Ignore your emotions. Take action. Be focused. Stay goal oriented. Be a Man. 

Conduct Yourselves Like Men.

Discomfort

The only path to growth is through pain. If you notice discomfort in yourself, there is a good chance you are doing something right.

“For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.”

Romans 8:18

Discomfort is the common land of the Christian. It is beneficial because it almost always pays you back with interest in growth and improvement. Discomfort in social situations is common. Discomfort due to the Christian the Name we wear is normal. 

Don’t confuse feeling uncomfortable about the faith with being ashamed of the faith, the two are very different. You can be uncomfortable going on door-knocking missions (which is 99% useless, by the way) because you are introverted and do not like approaching strangers. Being uncomfortable but still taking the action is the key to faith. Being ashamed, however, prevents us from taking action. This is the key distinction.

We shouldn’t feel bad about being uncomfortable.

The Radical Liberals want to pretend there are no bad feelings at all associated with faith, but they know nothing. The Radical conservatives think it is irreverent to suggest that the Christian life is painful, even unenjoyable, but they are merely attempting to protect themselves from impending judgement. “Don’t say Christianity involves pain or God will punish you!”,they say.

By enduring the discomfort, over time the things we deal with become less and less painful. It becomes easy to be proud of the Name we wear. Discomfort is a key to growth. Endure discomfort. Be a man.

Mantra

Discomfort is growth.

Discomfort

Application

The Christian life is a non-stop discomfort. (You will notice that we are using the word discomfort” instead of the word “pain”). You won’t hear that in the Church. These people dilute the commands of God so much that it may, in fact, seem easy to them. They want you to think the Christian life is all happy and fulfilling. Maybe for them, but certainly not for most. Don’t lie to yourself about the Christian life being all “fun”, you will only be discouraged and disappointed later. 

View the discomfort you feel differently. Awareness is the foundation of so many of these practices. Be aware of the discomfort and embrace it, for it is a building block of the kind of character that can endure any discomfort. This is critical because it means that at some point you will be immune to the discomforts of life. 

When you are taking on an action that you don’t want to do, notice the uneasiness within yourself. Notice how uncomfortable you feel and recognize that those moments are keys to growth. Just as a muscle cannot growth without enduring pain, so also your character cannot grow without it. 

Conduct Yourselves Like Men.

Sacrifice

“Through him then let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that acknowledge his name. Do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God.”

Hebrews 13:15 & 16

We no longer know the meaning of the word “sacrifice”. Parents give their kids money to give on Sunday, as if that teaches them anything. It dissociates sacrifice with pain, which should not be done. If it does not hurt, then it is not a sacrifice, that is what the word means. Giving up money you earned is literally painful. Those kids didn’t earn that money. What they give didn’t come out of money they themselves worked for. How are they supposed to understand the significance of sacrificial giving if they are giving away someone else’s money?

A few years down the road and the parents of these kids are shocked when they discover little Johnny thinks socialism is a viable form of government. 

In the Old Testament, men of faith would offer different kinds of sacrifices to God. These sacrifices were usually burnt offerings, where the man would take the best animal of a flock, kill it, and burn it. Do you think that was always a fun thing to do? It sounds expensive. We take for granted how difficult that killing your animals may have been because we merely read what happened, instead of experiencing it ourselves. 

Sacrifice is a tool to understand God’s sacrifice for us. Sacrifice is a form of investing, where we trade what we think is valuable on earth for more valuable intangibles such as character, trust or generosity. God sacrificed a portion of Himself on the cross for us because He placed such a great value on mankind. Why this sacrifice was made is a great mystery. God’s sacrifice was not without great pain and sorrow. Our sacrifices are much smaller than that, but they still cause some pain. This is just in the nature of sacrifice. Science has shown that paying bills with cash is painful, activating the pain sensors in the brain.

Some people will reject the idea of a painful sacrifice, because we should be “happy” and feel good and all that nonsense. Those are not Biblical statements, happiness has nothing to do with sacrifice. 

Even though our sacrifices are much simpler, they are still uncomfortable. We sacrifice sex with anyone we want in order to please God. Is this fun? No. Some Christian men will try to tell you it’s fulfilling to wait for sex and then have it with only one woman, but they are unconvincing at best. How would they know? They have not experienced both sexual lifestyles to be able to compare them. For this reason, saving oneself for marriage is a great sacrifice. 

Giving money on Sunday is a sacrifice, especially if you are giving cash (see above). We can obey the Bible and be cheerful and ungrudging yet still experience the discomfort of giving the money. This is the same principle as enduring the pain of training, but smiling when you struggle because you know that discomfort is where all the change is. 

Avoiding drugs is a sacrifice for many men. The weight of the world crushes man from all angles, yet he is charged by God to endure that pain while remaining sober. This is a tremendous difficulty in the life of man. 

The Lord requires many sacrifices from his people. Embrace the pain of those sacrifices. Be a Man.

Mantra

All Sacrifice Requires Pain

Sacrifice. Death

Application

There are always opportunities to sacrifice money, time, resources and comfort. What you have to do is accept the fact that most of these sacrifices are painful. The Christian life is painful. The sacrifices required in the Christian life are also painful. Accept this pain. Become comfortable with the pain of sacrifice. Look for opportunities to sacrifice and embrace the pain involved. 

Rid yourself of the idea that you have to enjoy sacrificing. That is unscriptural nonsense propagated by men who have sacrificed nothing in life. 

Conduct Yourselves like Men.