One of the more recent things I have discovered as one of the differences between men and women is the following:
- Women are relationship and problem-focused. They have people-oriented minds.
- Men are progress and solution-focused. They have solution-oriented minds
I believe this single fact can explain why there are more male inventors than there are female inventors. It has nothing to do with a difference in intelligence and everything to do with the difference in the focus of the genders.
Women focus on problems and need to talk about them. This is why women get together and grow their interpersonal relationships by commiserating. They feel better by expressing their emotions and sharing in one another’s problems.
However, men focus on solutions to problems.
If men get together and actually talk to one another, the conversation typically revolves around solving problems. While the discussion could center around sports or some other pastime, generally men will be busy suggesting possible solutions for every problem in the world, from politics to home repairs.
Now this difference in men and women can actually be complementary if both sexes do not take their natures to the extreme. By that I mean if a woman takes her problem-oriented mind to the extreme, she will chronically complain and nag. And if a man hyper-focuses only on the solutions he generates, he becomes overconfident and oblivious to the holes in his own solutions. But if both sexes appropriately complement each other, they can generate powerful solutions to any problem.
This is accomplished by a man first creating the rough draft of a solution to any problem, followed by a rational critique of the solution by a problem-focused woman to which he responds by fixing the problems that she points out.
Unfortunately, this does not happen often. Women typically end up nagging and men end up as isolationists because neither had the self-awareness to correct their extreme natures.
The new issue, however, is the sad reality that men themselves have lost their solution-oriented mindset. Men have become like women and simply complain about problems instead of doing anything about them. This may come as a shock, but improvements cannot happen if all parties merely sit around and complain about the situation. Someone must have a solution-oriented mind. Someone has to take some action, and traditionally that has been the men. But in the 21st-century much of religion has become feminine centric, and every scrap of traditional masculinity is ridiculed or “educated” out of boys by the time they are old enough to be men.
At the root level, when men stop focusing on solutions and start focusing on problems, they become more effeminate. This is because it is the woman’s job to focus on the problems and it is the men’s job to focus on the solutions.
A man has the solution-oriented mind.
I have noticed this with modern Conservatives and Republicans in politics and with religious Conservatives as well. While political Liberals and Democrats and religious Liberals have always been problem-focused and effeminate in their positions, this is new territory for Conservatives. I believe this is why Conservative, Republican men are beginning to mirror the feminine traits common in Democrat or Liberal political parties. It is due to the simple fact that they complain about problems without providing solutions. The same happens with religious parties.
These are not value statements; I am not trying to argue a moral point regarding politics in this essay. These are simply facts and observations I have noticed and common occurrences that you have likely noticed as well. Everyone is more than welcome to their own opinion.
Back to the focal point. Men in the church have resigned themselves to complaining about problems instead of actually solving them.
You can pull up a video of any congressional speech made by a Republican and watch this very phenomenon play out (with the possible exception of Dan Crenshaw, one of the few masculine men left in congress). Or watch a video of any modernist sermon today and you will see men complaining about the state of the world without providing actionable steps for improvement.
Sure, these men may make a few comments about “trusting God” or “Grace” or something. But rarely if ever are men given actionable steps that they themselves can start taking to improve their minds and become solution-oriented.
We have plenty of people complaining about problems and the state of the world and we have very few men doing anything about those problems.
We have plenty of people in the church complaining about this issue or that situation and no one doing anything to provide solutions or change the situation. Even the more Conservative men in the church do nothing but complain and offer no solutions. This is because men have been specially bred to worship women instead of God. Feminism is built into their pedigree. Their entire focus has been reoriented from making God the focus of their lives to making women the focus of their lives and checking all the correct behavioral boxes so they can win women’s approval and intimacy. But that is an essay all by itself. Let’s move on to some applications.
Affirmation: I create solutions and never complain about problems.
Application: The Problem: Men have become effeminate by being problem-focused.
A Solution: Men must reorient their minds so that they generate solutions. They must become Solution-Oriented.
Men should be producing solutions faster than everyone else can generate problems. Men were not placed on earth to be masters of empathy, they are here to build and renovate homes, civilizations, and societies.
Key to Masculinity: Stop complaining and start solving. You need to allocate maximal mental resources to solutions and minimal mental resources to problems. It is fine to simply state a problem, but be sure you have some solutions to go along with those complaints. Every complaint you have must be followed by a solution if not four solutions to choose from. If you do not provide a solution to the problems you state, you are effeminate.
“90 % of mental resources should be focused on solutions and only 10% on problems” ~ Tony Robbins.
If you are around males who spend time complaining, question them about possible solutions to the problems they complain about. If they complain about politics, ask them what action they would have the politician take. They should have a ready answer since they obviously have so much knowledge about managing hundreds of millions of human beings in the world of political war. Or if they are complaining about church protocol, ask them for four possible solutions. If they cannot answer the question, press them on the fact that they have no solutions to problems and are nothing more than mere complainers. They will hopefully become embarrassed and consider their position more rationally before they vomit their partially digested criticisms onto whoever has the misfortune of being nearby.
Plant the seed in your mind that you are a man who finds, creates, and executes solutions to problems instead of just complaining about them.
Be able to discuss those solutions in a calm, rational, stoic manner. No one listens to the guy who yells at the leader, “You should do X, Y, and Z you moron”. State your position eloquently and with a rational mind, giving respect to those in the positions of authority who are able to execute those actions. By doing this you protect their ego.
You can also leverage their ego by expressing how wise it would make them look if they implemented your solution, and they do not even have to give you any credit. If they implemented it, you not only solved the problem but strengthened a trade embargo. This is life, and life is a manipulation.
Conduct Yourselves Like Men.