The Separation of Emotion and Obedience
There’s a pervasive assumption within Christian circles that in order to faithfully serve God and fulfill His commands, you must feel a longing for fellowship, for worship, or for obedience.
Many of us grow up being taught and thinking that a lack of emotional drive signals a deficiency in our faith, and that God expects not only our actions but also our emotions to align perfectly with what we are doing.
However, the Bible does not support this notion.
While emotions can be a helpful companion to our actions, they are not a prerequisite for faithfulness.
The Bible commands the right attitudes and right actions — not the right emotions.
God commands us to be obedient, regardless of how we feel at the moment.
What matters most is what you do, not how you feel about doing it.
You don’t have to long to be with your brethren, nor do you have to emotionally connect with every aspect of Christian living in order to do what’s right.
Attitude vs. Emotion: What the Bible Actually Commands
First, we must understand the distinction between attitude and emotion. They are not the same thing.
Emotions are usually involuntary and spontaneous reactions to our circumstances [though you can learn to control them to an extent], attitudes are deliberate mindsets and decisions we make about how we think and act.
God commands attitudes, but nowhere in Scripture are we commanded to feel specific emotions.
If you think you find a command in scripture to feel a certain way, look closer and make sure it’s not about cultivating an appropriate mindset – more often than not this will be the case.
For example:
• Philippians 2:5 (NKJV): “Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus.”
• The command is clear: Let this mind — a specific way of thinking and attitude.
This passage doesn’t command us to feel something, but to manually develop a specific mindset modeled after Christ.
• John 14:15 (NKJV): “If you love Me, keep My commandments.”
• This isn’t about feeling an emotional surge of love. It’s about obedience.
Loving Christ means acting in accordance with His will, not necessarily feeling a particular way.
You prove that you love Christ by doing what He says, not by feeling a specific way.
• 1 Peter 1:13 (NKJV): “Therefore gird up the loins of your mind, be sober, and rest your hope fully upon the grace that is to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ.”
• The command here is to prepare your mind — an actionable decision to focus on godly thinking, not an emotional feeling.
These verses reveal an underlying them of the Bible – that God is much more concerned with what we do and how we think than what we feel.
Attitude and obedience matter; emotions, while they may be present, are secondary and not commanded.
Obedience Is Not Dependent on Feeling
The clearest biblical example of the separation between obedience and emotion is Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane.
In Matthew 26:39 (NKJV), Jesus prays, “O My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will.”
Here, Jesus feels horrible negative emotions – dread, anxiety, fear, anguish – emotions that are entirely human, but He chooses to obey regardless of those emotions.
His feelings did not determine His course of action.
This is a key point. Emotions do not negate the responsibility to obey.
God never requires us to feel like obeying; He simply requires that we do it.
Similarly, you don’t need to feel an emotional longing to be with your brethren or to serve in worship.
The absence of such feelings doesn’t disqualify your faithfulness.
The Bible is concerned with doing the right things with the right mindset.
Longing for the Church: A Command or a Choice?
Many cite examples from Paul, who often expressed a longing for his fellow Christians.
Take, for instance, Philippians 1:8 (NKJV): “For God is my witness, how greatly I long for you all with the affection of Jesus Christ.”
However, Paul’s expression of emotion here is descriptive, not prescriptive.
He isn’t commanding all Christians to feel the same longing he does.
His emotional attachment to the brethren reflects his personal experience, but nowhere does the New Testament demand that we feel the same.
We are commanded to love one another, but biblical love is action—it’s serving, supporting, and obeying God’s commands to benefit others.
The Command to Love Is a Command to Act
In John 13:34 (NKJV), Jesus says, “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another.”
Here, love is commanded, but love in biblical terms is not defined by emotional attachment.
Biblical love is seen in action—in serving, in humility, in sacrifice.
This idea is supported by 1 John 3:18 (NKJV): “My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth.”
Love, in this context, is about what you do, not what you feel.
If you obey God’s command to love by serving your brethren, you are fulfilling His command, whether or not you feel a surge of emotional longing to be with them.
Potential Counterpoints and Rebuttals
1. Joy and Rejoicing Are Commanded
Some might point to verses like Philippians 4:4 (NKJV): “Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say, rejoice!” and claim that this commands an emotion—joy.
However, the command to rejoice can be understood as an attitude of deliberate focus on spiritual blessings, not an emotion that arises spontaneously.
This is further clarified in 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 (NKJV): “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”
The focus here is on adopting a grateful mindset and keeping a focus on God, regardless of circumstances.
Rejoicing and being joyful are descriptors of mindset, not emotion.
2. Godly Sorrow for Sin
Others may point to 2 Corinthians 7:10 (NKJV): “For godly sorrow produces repentance leading to salvation, not to be regretted; but the sorrow of the world produces death.”
This highlights that sorrow can have a place in repentance.
However, godly sorrow isn’t necessarily an overwhelming emotional experience.
It’s an awareness of sin, a change of mind, and a decision to turn away from sin.
While emotion can be involved, the act of repentance is about changing behavior, not being overtaken by feelings.
Though in practice, I find it much easier to experience godly sorrow than to experience positive emotions.
If you concentrate your mind on what sin cost the Godhead, what it cost Christ on the cross, it often leads to negative sensations that generate repentance.
The key, again, in this passage is about the repentance.
We can hav godly sorrow all day long, but if we aren’t repenting – chancing our actions – it means nothing.
Attitude and Action Are Enough
In the end, you don’t have to feel an emotional longing to be with your brethren to obey God’s command to gather together. That’s just Pharisaical teaching in the modern world.
The Bible emphasizes obedience and right attitude—those are within our immediate control.
We as Christians are expected to act with the right mindset, to serve with intention, and to do what God commands, regardless of how we feel.
Emotions may follow, but they are not a requirement for faithfulness.
You don’t need to feel a surge of desire to attend worship or serve.
What matters is doing it with the proper attitude of reverence and submission to God.
God is more concerned with what you do and how you think than how you feel.
Conclusion
The idea that emotions are essential to obedience is simply not biblical.
God commands right action and right attitude, not emotional experiences.
You don’t have to feel an emotional longing to serve God, be with your brethren, or worship.
What matters is that you do these things, with the right mindset, regardless of how you feel.
Conduct yourselves like men.
Obey God’s commands, focus your mind on what is right, and let your actions speak louder than any fleeting emotion.
