The title is as close to hippie culture as I ever intend to get. But the truth is that if you want to start to control your anxiety, you have to live in the present.
The only place anxiety can live is in the past and future. It cannot survive in the present moment.
Think about it, when are you anxious? That anxiety generally comes from two main sources, no matter how many different variations on anxiety you can think of.
Anxiety can come from thinking about past mistakes.
More specifically, it comes from thinking about how past mistakes are going to damage our future selves. We ruminate on everything we have done in the past the catastrophize about how it will ruin our lives in the future. Perhaps we think we have already ruined our lives beyond repair.
In this way, anxiety lives in the past.
Anxiety also comes from thinking about future pain.
So in a way, ruminating on the past is actually a version of worrying about the future. Because we concern ourselves with how our past will create a more negative and painful future for us.
So we sit and look into the future and generate all the various events in our lives that will go wrong or cause us pain. This is anxiety in a nutshell.
You are likely familiar with the experience of sitting in one particular physical place, but your mind is a million miles away. Your mind is somewhere in the future, generating negative outcomes for your life. This is no way to live.
Anxiety robs you of the ability to live in the present and enjoy each present moment.
No negative future event is ever as evil as we make it in our minds. In our minds, we not only think of the worst-case scenario. We also think of every related worst-case scenario and combine them into one monster of negativity.
Our imagination, a tool for creativity and endogenous motivation becomes our enemy.
The way to combat this is to re-learn how to live in the present moment.
One of the best ways to do this is to begin the practice of meditation. Specifically, the mind-clearing form of meditation, which tends to be Eastern in origin.
- Sit in a chair with good posture (back straight and eyes closed). Focus on your breathing. Breathe however you want. I personally just focus on making sure my exhale is shorter than m inhale.
- Try to bring your mind to the present moment and visualize it being clear like water.
- Observe thoughts as they come into your mind, but try to keep your mind in the present.
- As your mind wanders into the future, gently pull it back to the present moment.
- Continue for as long as you see fit.
This exercise helps you being to learn how to live in the present.
By staying in the present moment, you can better manage your life.
In the book Psycho-Cybernetics, you learn that problems may seem like they are all hitting you at once, but in reality, they are coming to you one at a time, in a single file line.
By thinking about them as being in a single file line, you can handle them better. By living in the moment and focusing on the problem right in front of you, you can succeed and resolve the problem. Do not worry about the line of problems behind the first problem, they will each get their time
How often do you hear people complain about having “so much work to do” or “so many problems to deal with“. These people have a hard time accomplishing anything. They become so overwhelmed by the sheer volume of problems that they cannot settle their mind and deal with the first problem in front of them. If they would just quiet their minds and focus on the first problem, they would soon find it solved. They would find that it was not nearly as difficult as they believed and that none of their problems are that tough in and of themselves.
Most problems are small. And the problems that seem to be big are just a collection of dozens of tiny problems. Each one can be solved if we can learn to live in the present and take them one at a time.
This practice requires effort and patience on your part. you have to be patient with yourself and realize you are not going to develop this discipline overnight. Most people quit any type of attempt to change themselves because they expect results far too quickly. Instead, just focus on your system. You are developing a system of thinking which will allow you to live in the present. So maintain your meditation discipline and try to apply it outside of meditation, in the real world. Do not worry if you hit roadblocks, just focus on developing the habit of living in the present.
Learn to have self-awareness in all the situtations you find yourself in. Maybe put something on your wrist or desk as a reminder to live in the rpesent and take one problem at a time.
We can generate all kinds of negativity in our minds if we forget to live in the present moment. There is no limit to the amount of negative possible scenarios that we can dream up if we allow our imagination to run wild. By learning to live in the present, we can begin to discipline that part of our minds that constantly generates monsters to fear. All of us could use some training in that kind of behavior.
Live in the present.
Take on a brief meditation practice.
Become self-aware by using a reminder and taking one problem at a time.
Do not try to accomplish all your tasks at once. Avoid trying to solve all your problem at once. Everything can be solved in due time if we will take them one step at a time.
Even being at war with temptation requires you to live in the moment. When do you give in to temptation? When you imagine some negative outcomes in the future that will come as a result of you resisting. Learn to live in the present and accept that small amount of discomfort that comes from resisting temptation Each temptation will come to you in single file, one at a time. You are never tempted by a thousand things. They have lined themselves up and will continue to drip on your face until you give in.
Train your mind to stay in the present through the meditation practice and you can decrease the discomfort that comes from having so many temptations.
Do not forget to go to war.
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