Be satisfied with the Process

Everyone around you is hyper-focused on results. Now, this attitude can be valuable. It pushes people to achieve and lets us reach our goals. Focusing on results lets us know i we are moving in the right direction, the wrong direction, or no direction. It is valuable to concentrate on results from time to time. But at the end of the day, it is more valuable to focus on the process when our satisfaction with life is concerned.

Where focusing on results becomes a problem is when it robs you of the enjoyment of the process. The process of achieving a goal is pleasure. The process is progress, and progress is a key to human happiness.

When we become single-mindedly focused on results, we can slip into the mindset that we are not allowed to be happy or fulfilled until we produce those results. Until we cross the finish line, we cannot be happy with the race.

the process

People who live like this miss out on much of the juice of life. They miss out on the subtle enjoyment of simply working towards something in a controlled and purposeful manner. They give up hours, days, weeks and sometimes even years of happiness in exchange for one brief moment of happiness. And more often than not, it turns out to be nowhere near as enjoyable as they predicted. Think of many people who go to law or medical school, or sometimes even college or highschool. They sacrifice all sense of enjoyment of the present moment for the idea of some possible enjoyment in the future.

The solution to this is to shift your mentality and allow yourself to be satisfied with the process. Allow yourself to enjoy the simple work towards your goals.

If you can master this, you will find yourself exponentially happier in your life.

  • Think about your goal, establish it, write it down – decide what you want.
  • Now put our goal to the side and don’t think about it.
  • Focus your mind on the process, and on the work that it will take to accomplish your goal. Identify the small steps towards your goal.
  • List out all the small, individual pleasures of your work that you enjoy – no matter how small, insignificant or ridiculous they seem.
  • Concentrate on the components of the task you enjoy and allow youself to think about them for a while.
  • Now put your perspective back into the entire task of working, but continue to resist the urge to look at your goal constantly.

By focusing on the process, you free up your mind from being tied to the future. Instead, you can actually live in the present moment and learn to enjoy it. This will create additional happiness in your life and allow you to be satisfied with your work. Do the above exercise with your day job if you have one. List out all those parts of it that you actually like, even if you dislike th majority of it.

Allow your mind to spend more time focusing on the things you enjoy instead of the things you dislike. You will find yourself happier in life simply by concentrating more on those things you do like as opposed to the things you do not like. As you do this, your attitude will begin to change and you will discover more and more opportunities to enjoy your current work and life.

In all things, learn to shift your thinking away from results and direct them to the process. It will allow you to be satisfied in the present moment and will make you happier.

Many times in the Bible, christ uses various analogies about growth and agriculture. I think this served two purposes. First, it was a relatable way to teach people in an agrarian society. And second, I believe it showed us that God loves things that grow and improve.

Take an example from things that grow, they are not in a rush. They grow at a specific rate of speed, and they grow until they can grow no further. That is how we should be as well.

Do Not Lick the Boots of Philosophers

Do not lick the boots of philosophers.

Find me a man who has an opinion of his own, and I will show you one of the rarest men alive.

Unfortunately, most of our thoughts belong to others. We inherit them without question, though we think we originate them. Or perhaps we question inherited beliefs for a moment, but in the end, we accept them, and then convince ourselves that we “think critically”. 

You read in the Bible time and time again that Christ taught as one having authority, not as the scribes and Pharisees. This is because the S&P had to constantly reference previous writers, commentaries, or other thinkers instead of presenting the people with their own, original thoughts. They rarely provided interpretation of the scripture that was the result of their own rational thinking. Christ taught things that were new and unique, and He did so in a Powerful way – through parables. Christ is His own thinker.

28 And so it was, when Jesus had ended these sayings, that the people were astonished at His teaching, 29 for He taught them as one having authority, and not as the scribes.

Matt 7:28-29

Many in the church fall into the same traps as the scribes and Pharisees. They have no original thoughts of their own. They refer to everyone but themselves and their own thinking.

What is worse is that many people tend to worship philosophers, even to the point of licking their boots. Never owning an opinion of their own.

This is especially true of people who pursue advanced degrees in theology. Many times, instead of gaining advanced biblical knowledge, these people lose the ability to think rationally and they outsource their need to think. They refer to philosophers and other thinkers. Worst of all, they develop the ability to rationalize any position they want to take. This is what “defending the thesis” teaches people, to find a way to defend even the most ridiculous ideas in the world and then be awarded a degree and require others to call them “doctor”. There is more to life than licking the boots of philosophers.

lick the boots
Learn to develop your own opinions and thoughts.

Instead of constantly looking to others, look to God, the Bible, and lastly your own thinking. Build trust in yourself by determining your opinion first before relying on someone else’s. This will feel unnatural, but you must resist the urge to outsource your thinking to someone else. The majority of the religious world does this, which is not acceptable.

Do not deify philosophers just because they are popular. Socrates, Plato and Aristotle contributed much to the world, but they did not have it all figured out. they would want you to rationally think through their teaching rather than just accept them blindly.

In fact, it was Aristotle who said the following:

It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.

This is your task – develop the ability to entertain a thought without accepting it. Be able to chew your intellectual food without swallowing it. Become a “wine taster of ideas, who sips wine, swirls it in the mouth, but spits it out in the end. Not every idea is valuable just because it came from someone who wrote obscure philosophy that is difficult to understand.

Resist the urge to lick the boots of philosophers.

Command your own thinking and learn to rely more on yourself. As you trust your own thought processes, your own original thoughts will become more powerful and begin to surface in your life. Simply develop the strength to trust yourself.

Hard Work is Not Painful Work

There is an idea in the world that suggests that if work is hard, then it must be painful work. This is not the case. Your work can actually be very enjoyable if you will make it so with your mindset and planning.

You can change your perspective on world and view it as something valuable to your life. And you can engineer your work life to serve you and align with your goals.

First, we have to address the fact that hard work is overstated and overhyped in the modern world. Work is talked about in one of two extremes at all times. Either there is a hyper-focus on the hustle and maximum effort or there is a concentration on hacks and the easy path. I think as with most things, the middle is the most accurate. There needs to be a balance between massive effortful action and the so-called easy way.

But when it comes to hard work, people have come to the conclusion that hard work must be painful.

This is not the case. It is not the case that every bit of our working days must be unenjoyable or painful. I enjoy almost every day of my work. I believe I still work with a strong focus and with good effort, but I do not constantly run my mouth about “hard work” anymore. I do not talk about grind because it has a painful connotation. I try to resist that because talking about work this way misses the point.

There are times when a strong, sprint-like effort is necessary, but it is meant to be a short burst of energy. Even though many people have boring, soul-sucking jobs, our work was not designed to be that way from the beginning.

You also have to address the fact that hard work needs to be directed in a positive direction if you are going to even bother engaging in it at all.

If you start digging a hole in the ground and work really hard at it, 12 hours a day, what will you have at the end? That is right, just a hole in the ground. Unless having a hole in the ground was your goal, I would say that was a poor use of so-called hard work. So before you peel off into a sprint of massive effort, make sure you are actually taking action in the direction of your goals instead of in some other random, pointless direction in life.

When it comes to hard work, stop listening to people who yell about hard work.

Some people talk about work ethic and hard work and they do so with a calm, collected presence. If they need to scream and be all hardcore on you, they miss the point. On the other hand, sometimes that stuff is valuable and fires us up; but many times those people end up being simply annoying to the rest of humanity around them. They could motivate so many more people if they adjusted their delivery. Not their message, but their delivery. So work hard, give an appropriate effort toward the things you are trying to do, but be quiet about them. Work in silence and your success will speak out loud.

Do not become too obsessed with working hard for long hours until you have identified clearly the direction you actually want to go in your life. Otherwise, you are wasting your time. If you do not set your sail in the right direction, you could end up sailing in completely the wrong direction, the opposite direction from your goals.

hard work

Work hard at times, but do not become infatuated with the hustle culture unless the things they have earned are the things you really, truly want.

Sometimes it is necessary to hustle for 80 hours per week, but more often than not, the people who do this have no idea what they want out of life. They do not know why they want success or the material things of this world. Again, there is nothing wrong with earning these things or working towards them. Just make sure they are what you truly want. Not what someone else wants, just you. Make sure your goals are your goals.

Back to the main point, I enjoy every day of my work. Even if I have a long day and am tired at the end, I do not suffer for the whole day. I’m not in pain. I’m generally having a pretty good time and doing my best to maintain a positive mental attitude. I would also say I work with the appropriate amount of effort.

So in life, get rid of the idea that you have to engage in painful work that causes you to suffer for the entire day. You do not have to do that. Make good choices with your freedom. Hard work is not painful work – it is simply the work we were meant to do, and it was meant to be satisfying.

Further reading: Components of motivation.

Avoid Negative Influence

While there might be something to be said about being a positive influence on others. There is much more to be said about avoiding the power of negative influence. That is what is covered in this video.

Even though it is important for us as men and Christians to be a light to the world and a positive influence, there is much more at stake than simple influence. We place ourselves at risk of being negatively influenced by others when we try to influence them. In this way, influence is a double-edged sword.

We need to consider this so we can make the best decisions for ourselves. We have to try to influence people for good but protect ourselves at the same time. You have to protect yourself first and foremost.

This power of influence is one of the many reasons God placed such restrictions on immigration into Israel in the Old Testament. Because God understood the power of a negative influence. He knew that the way influence works is by an overwhelming absorption of new people into the system.

negative influence
We need to consider this in our own lives as well. We need to carefully watch who it is that we let into our lives at any life point. If we are not careful we can find ourselves under the power of a negative influence.

Manage your friends. Be highly selective about who you spend your time with. You need to modulate negative influences and maximize positive influences. If you are trying to influence other people, you need to ensure you have enough allies to influence them Influence only works if multiple people work to do the influencing.

Work hard to avoid exposing yourself to various negative influences in your life. If you can minimize this, you remain much more in charge of your life. You remain the captain of your destiny.

If you could only choose between avoiding negative influence and being a positive influence, you would be better off if you avoid negative influence.

Improve Focus in 4 Steps

Learn to improve your focus in life.

Let your eyes look directly ahead
And let your gaze be fixed straight in front of you.

Proverbs 4:25

People tend to mindlessly talk about hard work without talking about the equally important concept of leverage. Leverage is making sure your actions get the most “bang for their buck”. 

Today, men boast about turning a bolt by grasping the center of a wrench, or close to the bolt. Instead, they should grasp the edge of the wrench, where the force they apply is amplified by the leverage. Then they can boast about the results of high-leverage activity. 

That does not mean we never use focused, concentrated effort (which is the term I prefer to use instead of “hard work”). But rather that we use this concentrated effort with the actions that also have the most leverage. If I use a wrench and grip it to give myself the most leverage, I reduce the amount of effort necessary to turn it. But I can still use more effort if I want and turn the bolt faster. 

Improve focus
In the world, there are also high-leverage activities. In the gym, there are some types of training that have better leverage than others if you are looking for specific results. 

Your leverage in day-to-day activities is the tool of focus. You can improve focus if you want. If you can learn to focus, you can improve any part of yourself that you want. But you must be able to hold your attention on something for a period of time. 

Here are four steps to focus.

I – You must believe that you can learn to focus.

You must have a growth mentality. As cheesy as it sounds, you are not going to make much progress if you do not believe that you can change. Some people believe that what they can do or who they are is fixed, and they can’t do anything to change it despite their greatest effort. But the reality is that most people can make improvements to themselves in any area. Even if the improvements are small, these are still improvements. 

This is why you must begin to believe that you can learn to focus. Stop labeling yourself ADHD.  Even if you are, you’re doing yourself no favors by labeling yourself in This Way. Label yourself as “focused” and “disciplined”. Start to believe that you can become anything you want, including an Incredibly focused individual. 

II –  You must believe that Focus creates Focus.

Discipline begets discipline. You need to rid yourself of the limiting belief that focusing on tasks drains you of the ability to focus. Just like when you are training your physical body in the gym, you exert physical effort but somehow you managed to come out of the gym with more energy. The body may be physically exhausted, but the mind is fresh and full of energy. How did that happen? How do you put energy out into the world in the form of exercise yet somehow find a way to create more energy in your own mind? Perhaps it can’t be understood. But the same principle applies when it comes to focus. 

You must believe that focusing actually builds your ability to focus even more. Many people have believed this throughout the centuries. Different yoga techniques teach you to train your focus by doing Focus exercises. Begin to Believe that exerting energy to build the ability to focus actually results in more Focus down the line. And even scientists are beginning to catch on these days. The science behind fixed-point gazing to improve focus is beginning to develop.

III –  Complete exercises to train your focus.

Start with a fixed Point gazing. Learn to focus on the tip of an eraser, the tip of a pen, or some small point in space. You will find that your ability to focus increases. Mental focus follows visual Focus, as discussed by Dr. Andrew Huberman. begin with 60 seconds to 2 minutes of fixed-point gazing.  

IV Increase your ability to focus by using Blocked linear progression.

This is a fancy term for simply increasing the amount of focus you engage in over time. Just like in the gym if you’re exercising and you can complete 4 sets of 10 pushups. Eventually, after a few weeks perhaps, you increase it to 4 sets of 12. Then you continue to complete those four sets of 12 for a few weeks, then you to four sets of 14.

With this model, you linearly progress over time. Step by step you allow yourself to get better. As your body adapts to the exercises you can increase the workload or the intensity. The same thing applies to your focus. Begin with small exercises and don’t judge yourself based on how well you do at the start. 

Let go of the need for results. Don’t attach yourself to an outcome because the outcome is likely delayed. Just like in the gym, you don’t see the rewards for your efforts until weeks or months later. The same thing applies to your focus. The rewards are on a delayed schedule. Therefore you need to set your goal to improve your focus and then forget about the goal. Rid yourself of needing to achieve the results, as when we leave you frustrated. Learn how to fall in love with the process instead, and the results will come just by virtue of time. If you learn how to fall in love with the process you can have anything you want.

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